26 July 2017

Any Other Way

I wear an awful lot of white dresses. There's not a single item I own more of,  & I doubt this shall ever not be the case. There are the other preordained ensembles I fall to at times when ceremony or muddy fields demand another, but to be honest I only ever feel truly, utterly, irrevocably myself in a white dress. They cover every tide of my heart, every pull of the moon & sun & gravity & feeling & whatever else I am made of. 

I don't mind being the kind of girl who would. Who would, that is, follow unfailingly, every compulsion of her heart ~ in all the measurable & immeasurable ways. I actually don't believe in shallow water, not really: I tend to believe it's all an illusion, the way we way we categorize the things we've deemed big in a world apart from the things we've deemed small. I think it all matters. The things that look molecular ~ like the dress you always reach for ~ and the things that look like everything ~ like how you fall in love. There's something that tethers it all. Nothing is apart. And I feel like it's how I know there are certain ways I am bound to ever, ever be to some degree ~ the kind of girl who will over-feel it all,  who will choose magic over logic every time, who will be a morning bird, sometimes a hermit, often atmospheric, ever a deep-heart dweller, whatever I am, and almost always, in a white dress.

I wouldn't be any other way. 

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